INDIVIDUAL Therapy FOR ANXIETY & LOW SELF-ESTEEM
As your therapist, I’m here to support you with the anxiety that keeps creeping up despite your best efforts and the low self-esteem that gets disguised by over-performance.
does this sound like you?
If you learned to stay safe and manage intense feelings by relying on performance and perfection, then you might:
Feel overrun with anxiety that you try to keep from intensifying
Prioritize control and predictability
Worry about doing the “wrong” thing or being “bad”
Keep a busy schedule even when you’re exhausted
Feel directed by an inner critic that uses “should” statements (“I should be doing more,” “I should go for that promotion,” “I shouldn’t cancel my plans with friends no matter how tired I am”)
Dismiss or minimize your needs and boundaries
Struggle with self-doubt and low self-esteem
Take on the burden of responsibility in your relationships
Avoid taking risks or trying new things, especially if you can’t control the outcome or worry about looking “bad” in front of others
Avoid conflict
Ruminate on worst case scenarios (and there’s so many!)
Dissociate when scared or overwhelmed
Ignore or miss signals from your body
Disconnect from the important people in your life
Feel lost about your sense of meaning and purpose
it’s possible to change even our deepest patterns
Many of the people who work with me don’t understand why they struggle so much with anxiety. They are high-achievers and perfectionists used to being on top of things—their schedules, commitments, relationships, etc. They expect to be able to handle their anxiety as well. So when the anxiety comes and they can’t get a grip on it, they feel defeated, frustrated, and scared.
As kids and even as adults, when the most precious parts of ourselves are attacked, neglected, humiliated, shamed, or made invisible, a shift can happen. We develop strong defenses to protect our vulnerability. A way to keep the hurt out. A way to make sure it doesn’t happen again.
What emerges—sometimes immediately, other times gradually—is a fierce determination to survive, no matter the emotional, physical, relational, or material cost. If you’re like my clients, then you learned to protect yourself by becoming responsible, stable, and extraordinary.
There is wisdom in adapting this way. And yet, you don’t quite feel fulfilled or complete. You have a sense that there’s something in you trying to get loose.
As your therapist, I help you learn that it’s safe to slow down enough to be with what wants your attention. I teach you that the defenses that keep us safe often keep us hurt as well. With compassionate guidance and rich insight, I can help you find your way back to yourself.
“HEALING IS AN ORIENTATION TO LIVING RATHER THAN A DESTINATION.”
Prentis Hemphill
healing for the mind & body
01
Through relational psychodynamic therapy, we explore your early childhood relationships to understand how security and safety were developed or compromised. We learn what happened that led you to survive in the ways you did. In the context of the therapy relationship, we can safely practice being vulnerable while addressing potential fears of rejection and abandonment. I invite us to notice how we relate to each other, including what allows our connection to flow and get stuck.
02
Through Internal Family Systems (IFS), we seek to understand the different parts that make up who you are and how you feel and act. We explore which parts do what and why. By building mutually respectful relationships with our parts, we can feel less pressured to perform or protect. We can feel freed up to make decisions that align with how we want to live our lives and restore our true sense of self.
03
With somatic therapy, I help you connect with your body. Many of us have been taught to ignore, devalue, or criticize our bodies. When we move through life with urgency in an attempt to avoid anxiety and overwhelm, we often miss important cues from our body to take care of ourselves in the ways we need. Somatic therapy invites us to focus our attention to the emotions, sensations, memories, and beliefs held in the body. This approach includes relaxation techniques, guided visualizations, and breath work.
With each of these approaches, I draw on systems theory to understand how historical, cultural, political, and familial systems shape your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. None of us exist in isolation, and therefore cannot be fully understood on our own. Systems theory gives context for influences such as colonialism, patriarchy, heterosexuality imperatives, racism, ableism, and multigenerational trauma, as well as inherited resiliency.
the right fit
Finding the right fit is important for being able to do the kind of healing work you want. For the first 3-4 sessions, I check in with you about how things feel between us so that we can intentionally assess whether we’re the best fit for each other. I am rooting for your personal growth, even if it’s not with me as your guide.
We may be a good fit if you are:
Curious about your emotional landscape
Open to exploring past experiences or patterns to better understand your current challenges
Interested in taking some risks to deepen your self-understanding
Ready to commit to weekly sessions
Ready to commit to long-term work
Open to a non-linear healing process wherein some change might happen quickly and deeper change might occur slowly
We probably aren’t a good fit if you:
Want a therapist who tells you what to do
Want a therapist who just listens and nods
Want an “objective” perspective
Want homework assignments
Want someone who doesn’t challenge you
Cannot commit to weekly sessions or long-term therapy
you can have a full, rich life outside of survival MODE.
Book a free 30-minute video call. We’ll explore what your life looks like now and how you want it to feel like instead.